FROM THE DESK OF
DONA PENZA TATTLE, ESQ.
ASSOCIATE WRYE BALDERDASH
Wrye arrived in the office waving two American flags and wearing a red, white and blue top hat, matching cane and handkerchief puffed out of his t-shirt pocket. “What did one flag say to the other flag?” He didn’t wait for a response. “Nothing. It just waved!”
“Funny, ha-ha,” Tattle returned, adjusting the patriotic star dangling from the curtain rod. “Did you hear the one about the Liberty Bell?”
“Yup, it cracked me up!”
“No fair, that was my punch line.”
He did a little tap dance, ignoring her pout. “What dance was very popular in 1776? Indepen-dance!”
“You’re a hoot.” She did the perfect eye roll as a disclaimer. “Enough with the jokes, we’re off on a new Love of Literature Leap.”
“After you,” he said, stepping aside in a gentlemanly way to allow Tattle to jump first.
“Oh me, oh my, oh my gosh!” Tattle smacked her palms against her cheeks as she surveyed her surroundings. Her lips, at first, formed the perfect O, and then changed into a grin. “Now, it is a celebration.”
“Yup, we are celebrating the sci-fi book AN ALIEN’S GUIDE TO WORLD DOMINATION by LIZ FOUNTAIN. You can’t go wrong with a heroine whose dog is from Mars.”
Tip-toeing through the pages with a chuckle here and there at some of the humorous lines, Tattle agreed. “However, m’partner in snooping, you digress. We start off with a young brother and sister, one of them witnessed an horrific event, and then they were tossed off an overcrowded world in a pod. You see, the rulers of the world decided orphans and the elderly should be sent to another planet.”
“Not so nice rulers.” Wrye settled into a chapter. “And this one particular set of children are sent away with their “Aunt” and “Uncle” who really aren’t their relatives. Unfortunately, they land in a blast and are thrown to separate areas of the country.”
Tattle sniffled. “The brother continually looks for his sister into adulthood, but simply can’t find her. And now,” she did a short tap dance and added, “Ta Da! We get to Louise Armstrong Holliday and her alien dog, a blind mini-Schnauzer, Buddy.”
Wrye interjected while juggling his hat, handkerchief, and cane. “She discovers her boss is an alien, the color of lime jelly, zipped up in a human cover-up, and is bent on turning the human race into…. Well, we’ll let that be a surprise. However, Louie, short for Louise, decides she should save the human race. With manipulative skills she was unaware she possessed and a desire to be the heroine yet not quite certain why, she sets off for Eastern Europe.”
“There, with her friend, Jack, who at times she isn’t certain is her friend or in league with the enemy, she unravels the plot while facing various attacks from books, bat-crow thingies with sharp teeth, and other various monstrosities, including human ones. Buddy remains at home with Aunt Emma, but is still pivotal to the story.” Tattle entered the story to pet the dog for a bit. The dog didn’t notice.
“And that is all we are going to tell you.”
“Except, that Liz Fountain’s AN ALIEN’S GUIDE TO WORLD DOMINATION is a refreshing twist on sci-fi. Humor tuned to the beat of a different accordion player, catches you off guard and you find yourself chuckling at mundane incidences that reflects everyday normalcy gone berserk.”
Wrye bobbed his head up and down in agreement. “The characters are likeable, even the villains are those you love to hate. You keep telling yourself you’re going to bookmark and go to bed at the end of the next chapter, but find yourself reading away. It just draws you in and doesn’t want to spit you out.”
Tattle looked at Wrye, nose wrinkled at his choice of words. “Overall, if you are prepared to take a trip down sci-fi lane on a lopsided roller coaster with a laugh here and there, you will certainly enjoy this book. If we were the sort to give a rating, which we don’t, it would be five blind alien dogs.”
“To sum up, it is one fun read!”
Happy summer and to those in the States, Happy Fourth of July!
Dona Penza Rutabaga Tattle, Esq.
and Associate Wrye Balderdash
of Blather City, Wannachat
Created and written by
Angelica Hart and Zi
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