Thursday, March 17, 2011


Z: (Mouth drops open when Angelica arrives in the office dressed in green with a sparkling green hat and a green face. But that isn't what promotes his drool, it's the box of Irish Potatoes.) YUM!
A: This isn't for you, it's for the doggies.
Z: (Disappointment mars his complexion) They can't have all that sugar!
A: It only looks like Irish Potatoes, it's really doggie treats.
Z: Woof...woof...any human treats?
A: Why, of course, m'bud, I have the real ones, too! And cupcakes...and we're having Irish stew for lunch.
Z: You made it?
A: Heck no! You're taking me to the Bit of Ireland Pub for lunch.
Z: So what else is new.
A: Treats for Champagne Books readers, Irish sayings and quotes and blessings, oh my!

May the enemies of Ireland never eat bread nor drink whiskey,
but be afflicted with itching without the benefit of scratching

I drink to your health when I'm with you,
I drink to your health when I'm alone,
I drink to your health so often,
I'm starting to worry about my own

May you never forget what is worth remembering,
Or remember what is best forgotten.

St. Patrick was a gentleman, who thru strategy and stealth
Drove all the snakes from Ireland, Here's a toasting his health
But not too many lest you lose yourself and then
You forget the good St. Patrick and see those snakes again

Here's to our wives and girlfriends:
May they never meet!

May you have no frost on your Spuds,
No worms on your cabbage.
May your goat give plenty of milk.
If you inherit a donkey, may she be in foal.
Don't walk in front of me I may not follow.
Don't walk behind me I may not lead.
Walk beside me And just be my friend.

There are many good reasons for drinking,
One has just entered my head,
If a man doesn't drink when he's living,
How the hell can he drink when he's dead?

May you be in heaven 1/2 hour before the devil knows you're dead.

May you be rich in blessings, poor in misfortune,
Slow to make enemies, quick to make friends.
But rich or poor, slow or quick,
May you know nothing but happiness from this day forward.

May the road rise to meet you,
May the wind be always at your back,
May the sun shine warm upon your face,
The rains fall soft upon your fields and,
Until we meet again,
May God hold you in the palm of His hand.

These were just a few of the many wonderful sayings and blessings we have found. We hoped you enjoyed them, and that on this St. Patrick's day whether you're Irish or not, may your world be an emerald isle bloosoming with your heart's desires.


We'd love to hear from anyone interested in what we do. Anyone who writes us at and leaves an s-mail address, we will send you a gift and add you to any future mailings.

Angelica Hart and Zi
Champagne Books can be purchased at

Books can be purchased at

Monday, March 14, 2011

A Woeful Truth About Publishing

Let me tell you a story about one of the nasty little things in the publishing world that can threaten to put a publisher into bankruptcy rather quickly.

Once, a long, long time ago (okay more like 8 months ago), a pretty little author contacted her much wiser publisher with a request and a plan.
"Oh please, Madam Publisher, if my book could only go into print, I absolutely know I've got a large order waiting for it at Double Magic Stores, Inc. And they know me really well, so it's a guaranteed sale with no returns. Ever."

Madam Publisher, with her compassionate heart and desire to see her author succeed, worked really hard to get the requested book available to the distributors so that the Double Magic Stores, Inc. could order the precious tome. But all things didn't go as planned, because Double Magic Stores, Inc. decided they'd rather order direct from the publisher. Seems they didn't like the distributor's terms.

Madam Publisher wasn't crazy about the idea, since she wasn't fond of sending her product, unpaid for, to a foreign country (and company that she had never dealt with before). She didn't want to turn the order down, since the author had worked hard on procuring it, so in her infinite wisdom (and on the advice of her accountant), she only sent a third of the order. And waited for payment on that third. And waited. And waited.

And waited some more.

I wish I could say that Double Magic Stores, Inc. paid the bill and everyone lived happily ever after, but that isn't the case. As many independent publishers have discovered over the years, there is something seriously flawed in the way that booksellers do business. Seriously, how many of us can order a product, and then pay whenever we damn well feel like it? Returns started in the depression, to help keep bookstores in business as they wouldn't have to worry about paying out all the money and being stuck with a lot of stock that wouldn't sell. They could simply return what didn't sell and request new books to line their shelves. The depression ended, but this practice never did, but in fact, only got worse.

As of this writing, after a demand for payment letter was sent threatening collection action, we have received half of our monies owed. The remainder was held 'for anticipated returns'. No notification of when the final payment will be made.

Needless to say, this kind of behaviour has made this company think long and hard about its print program. We have no desire to go the way of the dinosaur, slinking away into bankruptcy because of companies such as the one described above, therefore, we have had to abandon the program, still in its infancy stage. Oh sure, we'll continue to offer printed books to our readers, but they'll be available on our website only, and any company wanting larger orders are going to have to pay in advance.

A tough lesson learned, but one in which we will gracefully concede. Leave the print publishing for those with pockets deep enough to withstand numerous unpaid accounts. Instead, I raise a glass to Champagne Books, as we continue onward, pursuing excellence in fiction in an electronic medium.

And then they lived happily ever after.

Friday, March 11, 2011




Dressed in ballroom regalia, already preparing for the awards event, Tattle announces, “We’re in for a treat. Our Love of Literature Leap is taking us into the books of three of the nominees for Champagne Books Author of the Year.”

Wearing his shamrock green suit and munching on Irish potatoes, Wrye grins, “Sounds tasty. Ready, m'Leprechaun-bud."

And they are off.

“We’re not in Kansas anymore,” quotes Tattle.

“Ummm, we never were in Kansas, and neither is Jared Bruin, the hero of the fantasy SHADOW FOX by Ashley Barnard. Although he was abandoned in St. Louis the story transcends from this world to another. Oh yeah, I’m likin’ it!” Wrye does a jig, in harmony to an Irish tune.

Tattle plucks cloverleaf, adding, “One can’t help but like Jared, despite that he’s a tortured soul, flawed, and an addict. There is simply something noble about him. He is lost in a world he doesn’t understand, unable to remember his early childhood, and driven to learn swordplay and old world combat skills.” Pretends the clover is a sword and attacks air.

Wrye jumps through chapters, urging Tattle along with him. “Then there is the lovely and mysterious Tarika.”

Tattle notices Wrye’s smitten look. “You’re starrrring.”

“Am not…well maybe…but look at her,” Wrye says, indicating the gorgeous woman. “However, she does have her secrets, many, mannnnny secrets, which in a strange way makes her perfect for Jared. They are kindred souls.”

“She also provides a link to Jared’s past. Maybe that is why his mentor told Jared about the opportunity to be her Master Swordman, well that and to put distance between Jared and his drug supplier.”

“Ah, see this lost journal,” Wrye points with a twisted cane, “it supplies many answers to Jared's past. He is from a different world, one that needs him to rise up and be a hero, but it is also a world that could destroy him.”

“Will he go to that world? Will Tarika follow him? And just what does she have to do with past? Is Tarika all she appears to be?”

That is what the reader will need to find out.

“I like the rain,” Tattle says, and swipes the wetness from her eyes much like Megan, a character who appears in the contemporary novel SHADOW OF GUILT by Michael Davis.

“I like umbrellas,” returns Wrye and opens a striped green and white golf umbrella to cover them both. “I also like weaving our way through Davis’ story. There’s Sean Paterson,” Wyre points out the hero as the duo suddenly find themselves in a cafĂ©, “a man harboring hate, a need for vengeance, and across from him is Detective Christine Sheppy who’s coping with guilt, a guilt born from the simple need to survive.”

Tattle seeps further into the story. “Their lonely conscious ridden lives become entwined as they try to help an estranged teen and her child, who are lost and targeted.”

Wrye becomes lost in prose, his green carnation wilts as if agreeing with the sadness in Wrye’s tone. “The ache for something strong and loving between them becomes fragile and strained as the haunts of their past refuse to let go. Christine trusted with her heart once and ended up hurt. Dare she trust again? He believed in the magic of forever. Will he find his way back to that belief again?”

Sorrow furrows Tattle’s brow. “Sean knows he wants that sweetness of being with someone for a lifetime, but his hate, his need for vengeance and past shadows make him rash, ready to destroy possibilities.”

“Can either of them escape the endless grief? Can they win out over the depraved acts of malevolent men who prey on the helpless? Will their emerging love be enough to conquer all?”

“Read and find out!”

“Ah, you are in your element, Tattle, m’gal.” With a hand flourish, Wrye indicates the Castle Hamingur, the backdrop for Ciara Gold’s paranormal fantasy THE KEEPER OF MOON HAVEN.

“Oh yes, there is just something so appealing and romantic about castles, especially mysterious abandoned ones that could be haunted.”

“We’re not talking ghosts here,” Wrye says, “but fairies. Noreen Willshire, an impoverished daughter of an Earl refuses to marry for anything less than love and thereby is forced to be a governess. In this position she soon discovers a diary, an ancient book of fairytales that bridges her world to the world of fairies when she reads from the book to her charges.” Rubs his hands together, “This is getting interesting.”

“Especially so, when Villemore “Vil” a cynical wizard appears before her in his natural and quite hunky form.” Tattle fans herself.

“Tsk, tsk, m’voyeur lass.” Wrye covers her eyes. “Noreen decides it would be best if Vil takes the book back with him to the fairy world. But this can only be accomplished during the Hunter’s Blue Moon. In the meantime, Vil realizes that his world needs Noreen’s light, and that he just might need it, or more aptly expressed, her as well.”

“And she realizes that Vil is seeping into her heart. Yet danger haunts their paths, and barriers arise to keep the destined lovers apart.”

“Her promise to return the diary is soon at hand. She must decide on seeking a new life far from the fairy realm and Vil or to bridge the gap between Vil’s world and her own.”

“What will she do…what will she do…?”

Hope you enjoyed this month’s offerings! Next month, we'll journey to the land of romantic humor. MY LOVE LIFE AND OTHER DISASTERS by Bernadine Darcy and SEX, DEAD DOGS, AND ME by Ed Williams.

Top of the morning to you all!

Dona Penza Rutabaga Tattle, Esq.
and Associate Wrye Balderdash
of Blather City, Wannachat

We'd love to hear from anyone interested in what we do. Anyone who writes us at and leaves an s-mail address, we will send you a gift and add you to any future mailings.

Angelica Hart and Zi
Champagne Books can be purchased at

Books can be purchased at

Thursday, March 10, 2011


Congratulations to the winners from our HEARTS AND FLOWERS celebrations
during the month of February.





If you haven't received your winning book, please contact us at

Thank you so much for being so supportive and for your participation.

Angelica Hart and Zi (Hosts)
Champagne Books can be purchased at

Books can be purchased at