FROM THE DESK OF
DONA PENZA TATTLE, ESQ.
ASSOCIATE WRYE BALDERDASH
"Trick or Treat?" asked Tattle, adorned in her Halloween finery, a witch's hat, a fairy's dress, angel wings, and a godmother's wand.
Eclectic being his forte, Wrye gives her a once over of approval. He strikes a pose to show off his costume, 1800's vampire Goth and a Phillies baseball cap. "Treat, of course." He adds several Champagne Books to her gathering basket.
A nod of appreciation and a thank you later, they take a Love of Literature Leap into Champagne Books e-books that celebrate the muse of October.
Landing upon a soft mattress on either side of Wren Darby they hear her say in a summoning tone, Jeremiah Ransom. "Who's Jeremiah? And where are we?" Tattle whispers even though she knows both her and Wrye are invisible to the characters.
"We're in Haunted by Debra Glass, a Young Adult paranormal romance. And Jeremiah is a ghost, a young solider from the civil war."
"Spooooky!" announces Tattle as she scans the book's pages. Her expression turns compassionate and she waves her wand as if that could change the sorrow welling up from the printed words. "Ah, poor Wren, she was in a car accident that destroyed her world, left her scarred, in her soul, spirit, and body."
"Her injuries also had another side-effect," supplies Wrye, giving his red-lined cape a twirl as he pulls a Bela Lugosi pose and wiggles brows. "Da da da daaaaaa, she becomes psychic."
Tattle ignores Wrye's drama. "Soon after, her family moves to a quaint town in Tennessee and a sprawling antebellum home where Wren hopes she can figure out her new ability and simply heal."
Wrye flings out an arm as if he were a host on a game show, introducing a new contestant. "Instead, she meets Jeremiah, the ghost who lived and died in her new home."
"Oooh, look at the chemistry between our young Wren and the courtly ghost...err...soldier." Tattle sighs and flutters lashes, "Young love, couldn't you just die."
"Actually, he did. I, personally, prefer to live rather than haunt," Wrye ends with an Elvis impersonation. "Thank you, thank you very much."
Tattle pretends to hold a microphone and speaks conspiratorially as if to a crowd. "Will Wren ever figure out how to handle her new psychic ability? How will she ever come to grips with loving a ghost? And just what is keeping Jeremiah from crossing over? Stay tuned for further updates."
"For those updates, read HAUNTED!" ends Wrye.
The duo appear in Zirconya: The Sage of Aluh'Nehn by Diana Ilinca, a Young Adult, modern urban fantasy/contemporary fantasy. Wrye frowns as he flips through the chapters, "Ut oh, trrrroobbble!"
"Do tell!" Tattle encourages, for she adores plots riddled with adversity.
And Wrye does while pretending to sit with his arm draped over the back of an invisible chair, mime style. "This lovely young girl, Caelum, who is just trying to get through life as a teenager, and we all know how difficult and theatrical that can be, has discovered she is an elf."
"How wonderfully delightful," Tattle says, applauding Caelum.
"Not so, my fine-feathered friend, she doesn't believe it. Although she had been forced from Zirconya, a magical realm into our spell resistant land, she remembers nothing. When, Maze, her guardian comes from her home world to bring her back upon her seventeenth birthday, his attempts to convince her of her true identity and her true home, fall upon a very defiant young lady. For she is equally convinced that despite being hunky and mystical, he is also annoying and most probably is the main nut in an almond chocolate bar."
Tattle produces a pair of granny spectacles as she scrutinizes prose. "Oh my, oh dear, the dimensional structure between Zirconya and Earth is being compromised, and scientist’s the world over are noticing. Maze must convince her to return home before everyone is aware of this other dimension, and before both worlds are destroyed."
With a large nod, a teacher's pointer, produced from the cape folds, appears and Wrye uses it to indicate a particular line. "Have you noticed the nightmarish creature?"
Tattle jumps behind Wyre while he banishes his pointer like a sword, but of course the creature ignores him. "Just what is a young teen to do?"
"She must remember her life on Zirconya if both worlds are to survive."
"Readers know what to do to find that out."
"Salem, witches, and Adrian's Angel by Angela Ashton, oh my," announces Wrye as they appear in the historical spine-chilling town.
Tattle falls into the paranormal romance, absorbs the intrigue, the scary, the uncanny, the frightening, and the intensity of love. "Goodness gracious and snakes on fire, Adrian Birichino is hot to the point of sizzle." She composes herself, takes a few breaths, and adds, "The dear man cannot overcome the loss of his childhood sweetheart, even though he left Salem to forget. After a string of flings, ending with Renee, a pretentious woman who believes Riley and her are destined for each other, he still pines for his first love, and no one, not even Renee, can compete."
"Eerie is the word that comes to mind," Wrye says as he takes his cape and places it upon Tattle's shivering shoulders. "Years ago, while standing at a street crossing with his best friends Jon Shelby and Riley Gail, Riley disappears. One moment she is with them, and the next, while the boys chatted, she leaned against a tree and was suddenly gone. Kaput!"
Tattle peeks ahead a few pages. "Adrian and Jon lived their lives being haunted by the incident, so much so that Jon finally committed suicide."
"This brings Adrian back to Salem," Wrye says, joining Tattle in her reading pursuit. "Where he begins to see visions of an incandescent angel, who hints at familiarity."
"He believes," Tattle trails out the last word, pauses, deliberately drawing out the anticipation, "his imagination has over-indulged. Yet, at the same time, he wonders how something unreal can leave tangible evidence."
"Meanwhile, Riley Gail, who had been propelled into the heart of the Salem witch-hunt must convince him that she is real, or she will be forever lost as one of Salem's accused."
Tattle runs two fingers across her lips as if zipping it locked, and then mutters, "That is all I'm going to say!"
Hope you enjoyed our Love of Literature Leap into the haunts of Champagne Books. Next month we look forward to peeking into books we are thankful to read, My Love Life And Other Disasters by Bernadine Darcy; Ask Aunt Emma by Carol Costa and Mark of the B*E*A*S*T* by Rebecca Goings.
Dona Penza Rutabaga Tattle, Esq.
and Associate Wrye Balderdash
of Blather City, Wannachat
Created and written by
Angelica Hart and Zi